They’ve just discovered a new species of monkey, called a lesula. According to scientists, it looks like an “owl-faced monkey,” but it has a bright blue butt — a color unknown elsewhere in monkeydom, which otherwise seems to specialize in vividly hued behinds.
I’m not particularly interested in the lesula’s keister, unusual though it may be. I’m much more intrigued by the lesula’s very human-looking face. Look at those large, intensely accepting eyes! Look at that placid expression, that calm demeanor! The lesula looks like a strange combination of your Mom when you were about six, a stolid priest hearing confession, and Tony Soprano’s psychiatrist.
With a face like that, who wouldn’t want a lesula around the house? It looks like you could tell the lesula just about anything — no matter how boring or bizarre — and it would pause for a moment, nod in a kindly fashion, and then say gravely, yet sympathetically: “Go on.” Can’t you imagine going to a bar with the lesula after a long week of work, buying it a beer, and starting a conversation by saying: “You wouldn’t believe the week I had . . . . “?