Girl Scout Cookies, Here And Gone

IMG_3178Today we got our order of Girl Scout Cookies, and it made me think that girl scout cookies must be the strangest product ever marketed.

What other product do you buy primarily because of guilt?  That eager, fresh-faced girl from the neighborhood shows up at the front door, and you feel that you just have to buy something from her or you’re not a real American.  This year, it was six boxes of the cookies.

And then, as soon as the cookies are delivered to your house, you try to figure out the quickest way to get them out of the house.  This year, Kish decreed that when the cookies came we need to get the Thin Mints, Shortbreads, and Samoas out of the temptation zone.  So, some of the boxes will be shipped out to Richard, some to Russell, and some will make their way to the coffee station on the 5th floor of the 68 building, where the ravenous secretaries and attorneys would consume just about anything dusted in sugar or coated in chocolate.

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Handling The Sunday Curse (II)

The Sunday curse has finally been exorcised!

IMG_3102Today, the Buckeyes played a tough game in the second half.  After trailing by six at halftime, the Buckeyes reacted to a well-timed timeout by coach Thad Matta, ratcheted down on defense, and played a great second stanza.  Riding a career performance from Aaron Craft — who simply would not be denied on his drives to the hoop — the Buckeyes topped no. 4 Michigan State, 68-60.  Evan Ravenel, Sam Thompson, Deshaun Thomas, and Amir Williams played very well.  Buckeyes fans can hope that this team is starting to find its heart.

The win gives the Buckeyes 20 wins for the year, and also means that they will have a winning record in the very tough Big Ten.  There’s still a long way to go, but beating Michigan State is a huge win for Ohio State.  Great win, Buckeyes!  Now, keep it up!

Guam Cats, Beware! Toxic Mice Are In The Air!

Brown snakes are overrunning Guam.  They came to the island aboard U.S. ships after World War II.  Now they are multiplying like crazy, have killed off virtually every native species of bird, and are biting humans and wrecking power lines.  As a result, Guam’s jungle areas are coated with spider webs, because the birds that normally would eat the spiders aren’t there to keep the spiders in check.

Guam’s snake infestation is giving Hawaii the heebie-jeebies.  If a pregnant brown snake, or a mating pair of snakes, hitched a ride on a boat and landed in the snakeless Hawaiian Islands, Hawaii’s beautiful bird population — which has no fear of snakes — could be decimated.

Guam officials are concerned that the brown snake problem could hurt Guam’s reputation as a tourist destination.  No kidding!  Guam sounds like a nightmare.  If your small island is infested with biting snakes and spiders, you’ve already managed to creep out the vast majority of humans.  All Guam needs to do to complete the hair-raising, creepy-crawlie trifecta is to throw some scorpions into the mix.

The U.S. government has come up with a drastic solution to Guam’s brown snake problem.  It will drop dead mice laced with painkillers over the island’s jungles.  The theory is that the brown snakes will eat the mice and die by the score.   Presumably, the government has some reason to believe that other mice-eating creatures won’t gobble down the tainted mice.

I’m not so sure — and I therefore composed this bit of doggerel:

Brown snakes hitched a ride to Guam, hoping to find some lebensraum

They bred and grew to levels absurd, ’til little Guam had not a bird

And as the bird population ebbed, the isle became more spider-webbed

Then Uncle Sam said it’d help poor Guam, by inventing a toxic mice bomb

So, cats of Guam!  Good cats, beware!  Toxic mice are in the air!

Handling The Sunday Curse

This afternoon the basketball Buckeyes will play the Michigan State Spartans at the Schott.  I’ll watch it, but I’m kind of dreading it.

IMG_3110Lately, Sundays have not been kind to the Buckeyes.  Two Sundays ago, the number one-ranked Indiana Hoosiers came to the Schott and beat the Buckeyes soundly, 81-68.  Then, last Sunday, Ohio State got embarrassed in Madison by the Wisconsin Badgers, 71-49.  The Indiana game was bad enough, because losing on your home floor, even to the top-ranked team in the country, is always painful, but the loss to Wisconsin was especially disturbing.  In that game, the characteristic traits of a Thad Matta team — tough defense, hustle, grit, and a don’t quit attitude in the face of adversity — were wholly absent.  The Buckeyes didn’t show up and didn’t look like the same team we’d seen earlier in the season.

Fortunately, the college basketball season is long, and there are opportunities for redemption.  The Buckeyes bounced back with a win over Minnesota earlier this week, and now they face another huge challenge in Michigan State.  The Spartans are vying with Indiana for the Big Ten lead, and you know they will be crashing the boards like Tom Izzo-coached teams always do.  Led by excellent point guard Keith Appling, the Spartans have a deep lineup of hard-nosed and talented players.  Sam Thompson, above, and his teammates will need to play well to beat them, and they could use some help from the Buckeye Nut House fans, too.

But . . . it’s a Sunday game.  Let’s hope that, this Sunday, the Buckeyes don’t play like they think Sunday should be a day of rest.