Not that your brothers and sisters shouldn’t be recognized. After all, you’ve shared all kinds of meaningful moments with them, and they put up with you during the teenage years — when everyone is at their worst. They deserve credit and accolades.
But if you’re going to do recognize your siblings, why not do it in the way most families do — by posting an embarrassing photo from the early 1970s, with a ludicrous white brick fireplace backdrop and chintzy hanging lamps, when everyone looks like an idiot and the clothing selections are sure to humiliate even the most hardened personality — whether it’s a pink tie, yellow knee socks, some kind of quasi-Germanic outfit, or combdown sideburns? Only my youngest sister Jean looks like a reasonable human being in this atrocity.
We all have our views on what constitutes romance. On Seinfeld, Kramer once expounded on the “timeless art of seduction” — only to find that his awkward efforts were misunderstood by just about everyone who saw them.
So, who’s to say what constitutes romance in Russia? A volatile mix of vodka, poor dental hygiene, and absolute, frenzied desperation would explain why someone yearning for companionship might pose in a cheap, poorly made mermaid’s costume, in the trunk of a car, in a rain puddle in the middle of street, or on a heap of trash, and post the picture on a Russian dating website. And what else but high-octane alcohol and hopelessness might cause a person to think that a fox head cap might be the key to unlocking the hearts of the opposite sex?
So, judge not. If you were trapped in a soulless, mind-numbing existence on the outskirts of Moscow, you might be tempted to post an evocative pose with a banana or a see through spider web hat, or a photo that makes it look like you are ready to disembowel the next poor, lonely wretch who is willing to be alone in a room with you.
Columbus politics are known for moderation and consensus, and the food truck legislation was no different. The vote on the law was unanimous, after City Council worked with food truck owners interested in greater access and restauranteurs concerned about safety issues raised by patrons congregating in the areas between food trucks and brick and mortar dining establishments.
Under the new legislation, food trucks will be able to park in the first or last parking spots on blocks in most commercial areas. In high-traffic areas, like the Short North, the food trucks will need to reserve one of 20 designated spots. Food trucks also will be subject to health and fire inspections and must buy a license and pay for an annual street parking permit. The legislation also established an advisory board that will periodically review the food truck rules and consider whether they need to be revised.
This is a great development for those of us who are food truck fans and love the passion, diversity, and entrepreneurial spirit — not to mention the tasty and interesting grub — that food trucks bring to Columbus. I’m hopeful that those of us who work on Gay Street, which as the coolest street in downtown Columbus is home to a number of restaurants already, will be happily surprised to see a food truck or two parked on our block as temperatures warm and we move into the food truck season.