You’re staying in a strange hotel, and as you pass the registration desk you notice a cheap sign that says “Confessional.”
What the? “Confessional”? In a hotel? Perhaps the lodging establishment is hosting a super-heated trade conference where spouses routinely stray, and therefore the hotel offers a soul-cleansing confessional as a necessary service?
Or, more likely, is the strange hotel the site of tryouts for some new, idiotic reality show , and “confessional” refers to the one-on-one camera time where a participant bares his soul about his goals and speaks earnestly about how he views Celeste as his principal competition?
Either way, it’s unsettling for the boring business traveler. And, I must confess, it makes me look with some skepticism on the other people in the elevator. Business travelers who need a “confessional” are not to be trifled with.
I don’t care how many time you’ve flown into LaGuardia, even the most jaded traveler has got to enjoy the approach that takes you right past downtown Manhattan and over the Brooklyn Bridge. Even on an overcast day, it’s one of the greatest sights in the world. Of course, it helps if you are on the skyline side of the plane.
If you’ve got the wireless function activated on your smartphone, occasionally you’re going to get pop-up information boxes asking if you want to link to some random wireless networks that happen to be operating in the vicinity. Usually the network names are generic and instantly forgettable, like “mywireless” or “Millerguest.”
Recently, however, my cell phone listed a wireless network name that stopped me in my tracks: “FBI Surveillance.”
For all I know, it really was a network for FBI agents who were checking things out nearby, but I’m guessing it was a razz by a fellow American who is tired of the government snooping on our every activity and thought such a wireless name might cause the rest of us to develop enhanced awareness of threats to our liberty. If so, it worked. It also got me to thinking: what are some other fake wireless network names that might give the random cell phone user whose wireless search function is on a bit of a jolt? Here are some suggestions:
Your suggestions are welcome. C’mon, America — let’s call an end to lame wireless network names!