A presidential preference poll came out the other day. Ho hum, right?
This one was a little different, though, because it offered respondents the option of Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, or a giant meteor hitting the Earth. Thirteen percent of the respondents decided they would take their chances with the giant meteor.
I think pollsters offering worst-case scenario options as an alternative to the two depressing major party candidates is an inspired concept, but I think the menu of alternatives needs to be significantly expanded. I mean, a giant meteor hitting the Earth probably would be bad, sure — but you’d at least hold out hope that you might be able to survive it, so long as the meteor didn’t land in your neighborhood. Other potential large-scale disasters that need to be considered as comparison points in order to truly probe the extent of our displeasure with this year’s godawful presidential choice. I suggest the following:
- A zombie apocalypse
- Radioactive snakes emerging from the ocean depths
- An invasion of flesh-eating aliens
- Killer robots that live in your toilet
- Being forced to sit through an unending screening of Rob Schneider movies
Only by truly and thoroughly exploring the list of worst-case scenarios can we probe the depths of our dissatisfaction.