This week small posters providing CDC guidance on techniques to combat the spread of the coronavirus have been popping up everywhere, including on the door to the men’s bathroom on my floor at the firm. One of the topics addressed by the poster is the need to wash your hands for 20 seconds. Looking at it moved me to compose some bad verse:
But this week I’ve been enrolled in Handwashing 101.
I always wash up, for sure, but now from what I gather
The CDC says it’s quite key to work up a good lather.
Twenty seconds sure is long, much longer than my plans,
It’s tough indeed for those of us with short attention spans.
I rub away, in water warm, and feel my mind wander
“Is this how Pontius Pilate felt?” is one thing that I ponder.
The water’s getting hotter still, like flames from a lit torch
But if it helps to stop the spread, my fingers I will scorch.
At the end of my countdown, with digits squeaky clean
I feel that I have done my part to stop COVID-19.
My hands have been boiled red, redder than the setting sun
It’s how you get a passing grade in Handwashing 101.