We’ve learned a lesson during this shutdown period: if you are ordering groceries for delivery in order to comply with a mandatory governmental quarantine, you really need to be specific about what you want. Otherwise, you run the risk that the person who is doing the shopping for you will make a judgment call that might not be what you intended.
We learned this lesson this week when we placed a delivery order and one of the items was “American cheese.” We were thinking of the Kraft singles for use in grilling cheeseburgers, but what we got instead was a box of Velveeta “liquid gold” cheese — which definitely stirred some childhood memories.
In the Webner household of the ’60s, a brick of Velveeta was a staple of the family refrigerator. Who doesn’t remember opening up the foil wrapper and gazing at that soft, golden brick still bearing the traces of the foil wrapper that indicated that the cheese had been injected into the packaging in liquid form. (Presumably, that’s why the package calls Velveeta “liquid gold.”) Unlike other cheese, Velveeta could not be cut and eaten by hand, unless you wanted to squish the cheese and end up with a thick cheese residue on your hands. Instead, Velveeta was specifically designed for melting and cooking purposes — like gooey grilled cheese sandwiches, or even more gooey macaroni and cheese.
We haven’t had a brick of Velveeta in the fridge for years, but it doesn’t look like it has changed one bit in the intervening decades. The packaging and presentation looks the same, although the box now helpfully notes that Velveeta has 50 percent less fat than cheddar cheese. Back in the ’60s, the fat content of Velveeta — or for that matter any other kind of food in the family fridge or cupboard — was not something that was disclosed, or even considered.
We’ll be using every ounce of this unexpected brick for cooking, because in the shutdown period, it’s “waste not, want not.” Yesterday we made scrambled eggs with the “liquid gold,” and it still melts as well as it ever did.