Ever Read a Book Twice ?

On occassion I have referred back to portions of the book “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne as a reminder of how positive thinking can help an individual enjoy a more rewarding life, but until recently I have never read the same book twice.

Years ago when I managed a Radio Shack down in Jonesboro Georgia I read the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. It is a terrific book that I think should be required reading for all individuals before they enter the workforce.

Since I am now part of the service sector again as one of the hosts of the Windward Passage restaurant, I thought it might be worth another read.

The first part of the book addresses how you can better handle people. Carnegie mentions three principles to follow. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain about people, but try to understand them. Give honest and sincere appreciation to others and try to see things from their point of view.

 The second part of the book deals with six ways to make people like you. Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember a person’s name when you are talking to them. Be a good listener and encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk about the other person’s interests and make the other person feel important.

The next part deals with how to win people to your way of thinking. Try to avoid arguments. Show respect for the other person’s opinion and never tell them they are wrong even if they are. If your wrong admit it quickly and emphatically. Approach disagreements with others in a friendly manner. Get the other person to answer “yes, yes” to a couple of questions to get their attention. Let the other person do most of the talking. Let the other person feel that your idea is his or her idea.

The last part gives some tips on how to change people without giving offense or arousing resentment. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing another person. Ask questions as opposed to giving direct orders. Let the other person save face. Praise even the slightest improvement. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you have suggested.

Of course some of Mr. Carnegie’s ideas are sometimes tough to implement and there is some thought involved, but that’s the fun part of it. Give this book a read if you haven’t already, it will help you achieve success not only in your business life, but also in your personal life.

Negative On Positive Thinking

When I saw this piece, it reminded me of UJ’s postings on positive thinking and The Secret.  The author questions whether the power of positive thinking and the constant exhortations that people should act happy and be happy, haven’t been harmful to our culture.  The issue is whether trying to be upbeat at all times causes people to overlook real problems and issues.  If something is wrong, why shouldn’t an intelligent human being be unhappy about it and complain about it?

I don’t think there is anything wrong with positive thinking, and I think there is nothing wrong with doing things that ten to make you happier, like listening to music that you like on your commute, rather than risking higher blood pressure as a result of listening to the news.  In my view, the problem with many “positive thinking” type books is that some people read them and conclude that they are entitled to be happy.  If you think that you are entitled to be hapy at all times, and you aren’t, you are bound to be disappointed — and disappointed people aren’t happy.  Being realistic about the ups and downs of life seems like a wiser course.

I’m a Big Fan of The Secret

I have to admit that I am a big fan of the book “The Secret”. I had a friend recommend it to me a year ago and it has made a difference in my life. The basic premise of the secret has to do with the law of attraction. Your thoughts become things ! If you think positive thoughts than positive things will come your way.

I currently text three friends each day with a tip from the book “The Secret”. Below are some of my favorites.

Ask, Believe and Receive what you want in life ! While doing this be happy with what you have and think about all of the good you already have in your life.

When you wake up in the morning say to yourself I am going to have a pleasant day today ! Your state of mind will drive whether or not you are going to have a good or a bad day.

If you don’t have enough money in your bank account or your relationships aren’t what you want or your health and fitness aren’t up to par these things are due to who you were. You need to change who you were to who you are !

Before you go to sleep at night replay your days events and if they didn’t go the way you wanted them to create in your mind how you wanted them to happen.

It is impossible to bring more good things into your life if you are feeling ungrateful about what you currently have because ungrateful feelings are negative emotions.

You can go after money and you might get rich, but it doesn’t guarantee you will be wealthy. Wealth comes from being happy in your relationships with your friends and your family.

Treat yourself the way you want others to treat you and always treat yourself with love and respect.

We are often taught to put ourselves last, but this is the wrong thing to do. By doing this we make yourselves feel unworthy and undeserving and we need to change that thinking.

If you have a relationship that is not working take a piece of paper and write down all the things you like about that person. Think about all the reasons that you love that person and like being around them. For example, if they are supportive of you, let them know it. By acknowledging their strengths you will get more from them.

People often look to others to create their happiness, but others don’t have the control to create your happiness, only you do !

Our body is a product of our thoughts ! All stress begins with negative thoughts.

Love, joy and gratitude eliminate negativity in our lives which makes it hard for illness to exist in a body that has harmonious thoughts.

Praise someone today as this causes you to emit a positive frequency and positive things will be attracted to you.

If we don’t love ourselves no one will and by doing this it will keep us from what we want ! When we talk about ourselves use the words “I am” as opposed to the words “I am not”.

Hope you have enjoyed these tips. If you want more tips than read “The Secret” yourself. It will be time well spent.