Overpromising And The K-Tel Effect

At the library last week I saw a CD with a title that promised so much I just had to check it out.  It’s called Inner Peace for Busy People, and the back cover says “Music Guaranteed to Relax and Renew Body, Mind and Soul!”

IMG_4685Well, that’s quite a guarantee, isn’t it?  Listen to a CD, achieve inner peace, and have your mind and soul renewed in about an hour!  Good thing, because as a busy person I don’t have more time to devote to achieving inner peace and a renewed mind and sould than that.

So, I put the CD on and gave it a listen this afternoon.  Candidly, I really don’t feel any different sitting here in front of the computer — but maybe when you’ve realized life-changing inner peace and had your soul renewed you just don’t notice it.

Anybody who grew up watching late-night TV in the ’70s — specifically, any commercial touting a compilation of songs by K-Tel Records — has necessarily been hardened to brash, over-the-top promises of auditory greatness.  When I was a kid I remember ordering a K-Tel compilation that claimed that it was The Greatest Collection Of Rock ‘N Roll Music Ever Assembled and being vaguely disappointed when it didn’t have some of my favorite songs on it.  Still, even K-Tel stopped short of guaranteeing inner peace.

The CD music was selected by Joan Borysenko, Ph.D, who wrote Inner Peace for Busy People, and Don Campbell, who wrote The Mozart Effect.  If you want to achieve inner peace on your own, just play the following selections in this order: The Lark Ascending by Ralph Vaughan-Williams, Berceuse, Opus 116, by Gabriel Faure, Lute Concerto in D Major – Largo, by Antonio Vivaldi, Symphony No. 35 in C Major – Andante, by Mozart, Concerto Opus 9, No 6 in G Major for Two Oboes, Concerto Opus 7, No. 9 in F Major for Oboe, and Concerto Opus 7, No. 1 in D Major for Oboe, all by Tomaso Albinoni (who must have been pretty inwardly peaceful himself), Piano Concerto No. 1 – Romance/Larghetto, by Chopin, and Piano Concerto No. 3 in C Minor – Largo, by Beethoven.

Hey, what have you got to lose?